Shortstack is standing at the end of the dining room table, admiring a quarter he’d just received. 

‘Hey!  Guys!  Look!  Come look!  This quarter is actually made at the US Mint!!!’

‘Of course it is, sweetheart.  Where did you think it was made?’

‘I don’t know–maybe the China Mint?  Almost everything is made in China.’

“Once there was a carrot named Chris who loved to chirp like a bear. One day, Chris went to the park to get some green pears for lunch. On the way, Chris met a piano walking on his eye who introduced himself as Annie. They decided to go to the park together when suddenly they heard a loud gurgle and pizza started to fall from the sky. ‘YAY!’ They yelled, and swam until Easter.”

Last night at dinner:

‘What’s wrong? Why aren’t you eating?’

‘I’m just trying not to eat like a race horse for once.’

‘Why start now?’

‘Yeah, Mom—you usually eat like a vacuum cleaner!’

‘We’ll just have to start calling her Hoover.’

**short pause to explain that Hoover is a popular brand of vacuum**

‘Then you guys can call me ORECK!’ (’That’s a type of vacuum, too. They come in red, blue…’)

This morning before school, neither of us can let it go:

‘We’ve had a week of good mornings, haven’t we Oreck?’

‘Hey! We can call the baby Rainbow. You’re Oreck, Mommy’s Hoover, and I’m just a sucker!’

Shortstack is not nearly as amused as we’d thought he would be. It appears that the Daddy and I both are mere carriers for the recessive ‘being able to let things drop before you take them that extra step to far’ gene. Oh well. If he can’t manage to embarrass himself, we’ll take care of it for him!

Shortstack had a friend come home from school with him for the first time yesterday. Here are some of my favorite quotes (the ones that I can remember, at least…) from the afternoon. Unfortunately, there is no way to recreate the boys’ voices and inflection. I was in stitches the entire time. Would it always be so entertaining if both kids were your own??? The boys were in the backseat playing with the sunglasses and hats they had:

‘We are stylish.’ ‘We like to be stylish.’ ‘We like to be stylish to be/for _____. ‘ (this continues back and forth for a minute or two) ‘We like to be stylish to be silly.’ (pause) ‘But L, you already ARE silly…’

Also in the car:

‘I am an elephant. Do I look like an elephant? You look like an elephant.’ ‘Let’s be elephants. ( hands and fingers held up like tusks…) I’m going to charge your mama.’ ‘GET THAT MAMA!!!’

The boys had an in depth discussion about colors. After going back and forth for a while, this was how it ended:

‘I like ALL the colors in the rainbow. Even pink. But pink isn’t in the rainbow.’ ‘I like pink, too. Shortstack’s mom, did you know pink is the new boy color?’

A few weeks ago I made some mock sushi for Shortstack’s birthday snack at school. You’d think we lived in some desolate place because my fear of running out of ingredients causes me to seriously overbuy just about everything. That is, IF I actually get all of the ingredients on the list. But I digress… I just hadn’t put all of the leftovers in the higher cabinet yet.

Fast forward to this morning when I wake up and wander into the kitchen lamenting the fact that we didn’t buy a coffemaker with a timer (Schedule? Schedule? What’s that? School was and continues to be a serious kick in the pants for us as far as getting going in the morning goes.) Shortstack proudly tells me he made his own “instant breakfast” and offers to make me some. Here’s his secret recipe. Shhh, I didn’t tell you!

1 questionable amount of swedish fish
1 questionable amount of gummy worms
1 fruit roll up

Put all ingredients in bowl and mix. Enjoy!

Looking on the bright side, at least he’s got plenty of energy this morning… At least it’s a Saturday!